Thursday 30th July

Thurs 30th July
As ever our journey was not without drama. We arrived at Chicago with 40 minutes to catch the plane to St Louis; in that time we had to find our luggage, clear customs, catch the train to the next terminal and find the departure gate.
When we arrived at customs there was a queue that wouldn't have been out of place at Alton Towers. By being totally pathetic and begging other tourists to let us jump the queue, we eventually got to the front where we had to be fingerprinted, photographed and forced to listen to the customs officers discussing the best place to have a facial!
By the time we got through there was ten minutes to boarding. We didn't even have time to put the luggage labels on for the next flight and just handed them over to some guy shouting 'St Louis'. At this point we felt we might just catch the flight but we hadn't bargained for our next security check. Elbowing our way past people in pushchairs and wheelchairs we found we had to remove practically every item of clothing. Chaos reigned - at the other end of the x-ray machines; there were guards shouting 'Who does this bag belong to? Are these your shoes...'
With ten minutes to the plane leaving I found myself running (shoe laces undone, passports and money falling out of the rucksac) after Jack, who having the best eye-sight had managed to find the departure gate.
With five minutes to spare we got on the plane. I thought I was having a heart-attack!

John and Suzy met us at the airport.
Went up the St Louis Arch - and got a good telling off for getting in the wrong pod coming down (because the girls at the top of the arch directing operations were arithmetically challenged). Bet that is a really good job because you get to give tourists a damn good bo****ing.

Ate at Hooters on the way back to Louisiana. Check out the photos.

Friday 31st July

Frid 31st July
John attacks the mole in the garden with a shovel. Fisherman Dave tells John he had the same trouble with moles, but he shot it with a .45!

Visit to Hannibal doing the Tom Sawyer thing. Bought tickets from very refined Southern ladies. Visited pawnshop with a view to buying a banjo for Jack to bring back. None in stock but listened to very interesting slanging match between the owners of the shop and two disgruntled customers.
Went down to the levy only to find we had missed the paddle boat.

Jack and John went fishing in the creek. Jack lost his bobber?! and John managed to get his fishing line and float wrapped round the steel girders of the bridge.

Evening spent at the Pike County Fair where we watched the Demolition Derby and some very fat people riding horses; in fact at one point it would have been more appropriate for the rider to carry the horse!

Sat 1st August

Sat 1st August Early morning start to go fishing with Dave on the Mississippi. Crossed over into Illinois to get a good spot on the river. Dave accompanied by Chopper.Jack chases off two rich fisherman in a boat, much to Dave's approval.Sat pm leave Louisana for Florida trip.Spent our first night in the truck near Clarksville in Tennessee.

Sunday 2nd August

It is 90 degrees outside but it's nice and cool in the truck with the air-con on. It is almost 11 am and we are waiting to unload our second drop. John is taking a nap. A very eventful day yesterday. The journey to Florida was amazing. What a beautiful state Tennessee is.

Here is the route:take the last train to CLARKSVILLE - route 24 to NASHVILLE skyline - through a place called MURFREESBORO - MANCHESTER- MONTEAGLE -pardon me boy...CHATTANOOGA-NICAJACK LAKE- I got GEORGIA on my mind- ROUTE 75 - ATLANTA - MACON - ROUTE 16 SAVANNAH ROUTE 95 FERNANDINA BEACH (saw egrets wading and an alligator in a nearby lagoon) Jack gutted because he was lozzing in the back! Just dropped a load (if you'll pardon the expression) at JACKSONVILLE and going to TAMPA shortly.
The most exciting part of the journey so far for me was travelling through Tennessee and Georgia - the road was full of signs pointing out Civil War battlefields. I picked up a really good booklet at a rest area on the Civil War. Will bring it home for you to look at.
As ever our trip has not been without a bit of drama to spice up our lives. John decided to drive to the drop in Fernandina Beach instead of staying the night at a truck stop. It was pitch black, very difficult to see the road signs and he missed the factory. We ended up down a suburban road about as narrow as our street with a ditch on either side and he had to reverse the truck about 400 metres! We eventually found the place and parked up outside only to see a sign that said 'No overnight parking'.

However, we parked up for the night. The problem was, it was only about 50 metres from the houses on the street. The refrigerated unit makes an unbelievable racket so we were worried that someone might complain or call the police. About 3 am there was a tremendous hooting.

BEWARE OF FALLING HOR-ROCKS

John had forgotten that he was on the top bunk and leapt off - he went down like a bag of spuds! Luckily he was ok. Turns out we were parked right next to a railroad track and a passing freight train gave this really loud hoot as it came through the level crossing. So perhaps the noise of the truck was never going to bother the residents too much. John saw the funny side once he had checked to see that nothing was broken. Jack laughed so much, he had to have a wee in a bottle!

Monday 3rd August

Just finished the delivery now. Thunder and lightning and torrential rain - it's like standing in a warm shower. John keeps reassuring us it isn't the hurricane season yet but there are lots of road signs showing the quickest routes away from the coast when a hurricane is imminent. Never mind, it could be worse. You could be sharing a bunk with Jacko!
Tues 3rd August
In Tampa Bay Florida today - even more adventures. John took a wrong turning in the truck and had to reverse onto a 4 lane highway whilst I held up the traffic wearing only my pyjamas and a a florescent jacket. Will post some more pictures when I get the chance and more tales of toilets, truckstops and weirdos to follow.
Meanwhile we are still on our search for a banjo - hope Jack doesn't turn into one of these!

Tuesday 4th August

Tuesday 4th August.
Very early start to get to Palmetto which is very near the Gulf of Mexico on Highway 41. John took a wrong turn and was forced to reverse across a four lane highway. I was required to walk into the middle of the highway to stop the rush hour traffic. Pity Jack was watching Jonathan Ross on the Arcos -if he had been paying attention he could have photographed me with my hand up signalling frantically whilst, wearing a florescent jacket and my second best pyjamas!
Then on to Highway 275 (this is for Tony who is following our progress on the map) - aka the Sunshine Skyway which crosses Tampa Bay see photos.A bit disconcerting to keep seeing road signs pointing to emergency routes running from the hurricane coast.
Finally, back across the bridge to drop our last load at Arcadia where the temperature gauge on the wing mirror registered 111 degrees!
John gave us another turn by having a choking fit after a Jimmy Carter peanut went down the wrong way (He denied it was the peanut and put it down to a rare medical condition brought on by lying in the the top bunk with your head lower than your feet????????????).
Fortunately he recovered. Jack and I were wondering how we might get the truck back to Louisiana - I would probably have to change gear while Jack operated the steering and foot pedals.

Whilst waiting for our slot to unload, John filled us in on some of the more eccentric characters of Louisiana Missouri.
Shauny who was looking for a career change was advised by John to start a business mowing lawns. Shauny said that the market was already cornered by 'Shovel-Head'. No one seems to be sure of his real name. Apparently Shovel-Head is often seen running round the town waving a rebel flag - an activity that doesn't endear him to a large majority of the towns people. He also bought himself a do-it-yourself tattoo kit and tattooed his name on to his forehead whilst looking in the mirror. Apparently the effect is very interesting!
Will try to get a picture when we get back.

Wednesday 5th August

Wednesday 5th August.This is for Ma. This part of the Blog is called 'WHERE ARE THEY NOW?'
* RAYMOND HULTON
* EDDIE HALL
* ROBBIE GREAVES
* NELLIE MORRIS AND EDEY MOSS
* LUSH
* WATSONS
* LICK
* DICKY RIGBY
Just reminiscing - you don't need to spend a fornight composing an email about their whereabouts!
We are just picking up a truck load of orange juice (at a factory near Tampa) to bring back to St Louis.

HAIRNETS AND BEARDNETS

If you work at a food handling plant like this you have to wear a hairnet but if you have a beard you also have to wear a beardnet. John once had to go inside a place like this and wore the beardnet on his head and wondered why he was getting strange looks!See pictures of John modelling the aforementioned head and beard gear. On the journey back, we pulled back into the rest area around the 'Gulf of Mexico' for a quick foot spa.